Argument for Staying Married When You Have Kids

Last night on Bones (The Girl in The Mask, episode 88), a character who was a parent-figure to his murdered sister said to Bones who was questioning whether loving someone else so much was worth it, replied,

"If I was willing to give up my life for Satchi, why would I not be willing to risk my happiness for her?"

As a parent, I will do anything and everything to defend my children. It scares me how fiercely I feel for them. I have no doubt that 99% of all parents feel that way. And yet, and yet, we have a devastating divorce rate.

Time and again, studies have shown that even "friendly" divorces have deeply destructive impacts on the children of the marriage. Divorce scars children deeply and lastingly.

But as parents, if we were willing to die to protect our children from harm, why wouldn't we wait to dissolve our marriage until after our youngest child had matured into adulthood? Why wouldn't we put our own happiness (so long as real abuse is not a factor) on hold to finish our commitment to raising our children.

Children are our most precious contribution to ourselves, our family, our communities, and our countries. Without properly raised children, society collapses.

Have we become so selfish and self-centered (I blame the Baby Boomers) as a society that we scratch and scar our children's psyches for our own immediate happiness?

And does getting a divorce actually make you happier? Single parenthood doesn't look all that great to me.

Finally, it seems to me that Bones, the TV show, is rapidly becoming a debate between intellectual elite Bones and intelligent traditionalist Booth. I look forward to seeing which one the writers lets "win".

[UPDATE - Just so we are clear, I am Catholic and will not get a divorce ever. In fact, my husband and I have married each other in 4 (yes, four) separate marriage ceremonies, long story. And I will never ever leave him, not even if I die. Because I am just that kind of chick.]